My mind was racing. I had only spent three days and two glorious nights with this man.He was my first, and up until half an hour ago, he was my only. Looking back to last weekend caused strong feelings to rush over me.That had been the most intense experience of my life. It had left me confused, with so many questions left unanswered. But, out of all those questions, there was only one certainty. I was attracted to this man as I’ve never been attracted to anyone ever before.This past weekend, he made me feel for him things that I haven’t felt for any of the girls that I’ve ever been with since I started dating. The sight of Thomas thrilled me, excited me. He’s all I’ve thought of since this past weekend, and that scares the hell out of me.Even more confusing was how I had just allowed myself to be used like some common little cock whore. I let myself be used by some jerk taking advantage of me as I rolled down the tracks on this emotional train wreck that I was putting myself on.In. Having read of abeautiful bracelet I asked Maman about it."Actually it is yours for it belonged to your mother Marcela. You mayhave it and there are others as well."So the history of my family and now what I'd seen with my Aunts was asexual carnival. Because I knew of no other alternative it didn't causeme real concern. My Aunts loved me and cared for me. What else wasimportant?A year and a half after I'd discovered that Sarah wasn't a real female Icame home late from school to find her with a tenant in her bed."Aunt Sarah I thought you were Suzanne's? How can you be with Giselle andSuzanne?" I'd found them in bed but their nakedness was concealed by thelinens. I left the bedroom crying.Later that night Suzanne and Sara came to my room."You are loved by both of us as if you were are own daughter Marie. Ouractivities in bed shouldn't be your concern but we now understand that afrank discussion is necessary."Suzanne told me of Sarah's hidden gender and their business with thewomen.
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